Effective parenthood is really just a series of trade-offs.
In many of these trade-offs, we as parents are forced to choose between our own happiness and that of our children. And today, I got hit with a pretty serious dose of harsh trade-off reality.
I received this:
It is an “Annoying Orange.” It is a promo piece for a Cartoon Network show called Annoying Orange.
And it certainly lives up to its name. It makes noises that make me want to feed it to a family of starving, feral honey badgers, light the remains on fire and fling them into the mouth of an active volcano.
But would my 3 year old son love it if I gave it to him?
Yep, he sure would.
And thus you have my serious decision. My Spanish Prisoner. My Sophie’s Choice.
If I gave it to him, I can just picture it – that happy little smile, the bounding from room to room as he blissfully brandishes the Annoying Orange, which is droning on in its loud, nasal, “WASSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUP.”
He would be so pleased. He would likely carry it everywhere with him – take it to bed to be his little orange buddy, keeping him safe while he sleeps.
So, of course, when pitting all that happiness against a little bit of daily annoyance, the choice is pretty clear. Any decent parent would do the same thing, right?
Heeeeere, honey badger . . . heeeere, honey badger . . . are you hungry, little fella?